Beyond the Binary’s very own AGONY AUNCLE: CN Lester!


We’re so excited to announce the relaunch of our ‘Ask an Auncle’ column, with blogger, writer, and musician CN Lester!

Hi everyone – if you’re reading this you may know me from my writing, from Transpose and/or from my music. I’m not a formal therapist – but I’ve learnt a few things about inter-community support – as a volunteer counsellor and activist. Whatever you want to ask – I’m hear to listen.

Have a question being non-binary, your gender identity, or a related issue or problem? Submit all questions to CN through our main e-mail with the subject headline ASK AN AUNCLE. All questions will be forwarded to CN and the column will publish every two weeks. While there will be some questions CN cannot give an answer to, they will do their best to signpost and share resources and organisations that can help.

To see examples of other informative posts/blog discussions CN has written and been a part of on a range of trans issues, check out their own website here:

Practical advice for the non-normatively gendered
Twenty-One questions on trans issues answered
10 seriously easy things cis people can do…
Beyond the Binary Masterpost
Everything you ever wanted to know about top surgery* – Answers!

We’re really looking forward to sharing knowledge and giving you some solutions to your problems, or just some stuff to think about!


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  5. Hi!

    I’m not sure if I can properly define myself as a non-binary person. I was raised by my parents in an extremely gender neutral way and I was always told that it didn’t matter who you were or what you wore in this world, it only mattered if you were a good person. Because of this upbringing, I now experience little to no gender dysphoria and this leaves me wondering if I count as non-binary? I was assigned female at birth, however I have never been 100% girl or 100% boy. My brothers and sisters do not feel this even though they had the same upbringing. I don’t really know whether I count as a non-binary person as I feel like being non-binary is so hard to define. But I also don’t really feel like my gender identity matters that much and I don’t tend to tell people unless they ask. I use the pronouns either he/she, and I hear that non-binary people usually use they? Do any of these things make me less non-binary? Are there several categories which go into non-binary?

    Please help me out!

    Thanking you 🙂

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